I figured my very first blog post for my new (and oh so pretty) site would be something I get asked alot…like ALOT. I probably receive more Instagram DM’s, FB messages, and emails about this topic than anything else.
The question being: Is it possible to manifest a man?
The questions come in different variations. Women want to manifest a certain relationship that fulfills them. They want to find their ideal mate who makes them feel like the queens that they already are. They want to fall madly in love and feel true passion, or they want to mold the man that they are already with into someone who is a better match.
As human beings, we are meant to love and be loved in return. A loving, nurturing, passionate relationship is something that deep down we ALL desire.
Before I answer this question, let me tell you a quick backstory on why I feel called to talk about this topic. In October of 2015, I ended a 6 year relationship with someone who I initially thought would be my happily ever after. Things were good between us. We were in the middle of discussing the next step in our relationship and an engagement was inevitable.
Just about a month before I ended the relationship, I planned to go see Tony Robbins live at his event called “Unleash The Power Within” in Los Angeles. I was so effing excited about this that I went ahead and bought one of his programs from his product library online. I eagerly started to listen to his CDs and devoured the information. There’s something about Tony Robbins that will motivate you to make incredible life changes.
When I came around to the relationship section, Tony was talking about writing down what your “ideal mate” looks like, and what your “mate from hell” looks like on the worksheets that come with the program. He mentioned that even if you’re already in a relationship, don’t just write down what you currently have to not “upset” your partner. It was totally ok and he recommended to think of qualities your mate may not have that you would want in your ideal mate, and it was totally ok to do the vice versa– write down qualities they do have as a mate from hell. The exercise was primarily for just figuring out what you consider your ideal mate. We all know that there is no such thing as a PERFECT match, but we do have a pretty good idea of who is pretty damn close.
I thought nothing of the exercise at the time. I wrote down exactly what I wanted my ideal mate to look like, be like, think like, and act like. It was fun. Then I stashed the worksheet back into the program box on my bookshelf and didn’t look at it again. I totally forgot about it.
Fast forward to the Tony Robbins event that led me to reconsider staying in my long-term relationship. I broke up with him a few days after the event for no other reason than figuring out that I was still young, very driven, independent, and I wanted to explore the world before I settle down again. I had the intention of staying single for at least a year. I was finally happy with myself and ready to embrace the single, slightly uncomfortable life.
And then one evening, I was told to download Tinder. Just for fun and games. Just to escape my misery while I thought it would be a GENIUS decision to do a strict vegan detox after the breakup. Nothing but Tinder could solve my cravings and my withdrawals at that time, so it seemed like a fantastic idea.
Not even 25 swipes later, I come across this guy named Brennan. Some guy Brennan who lives in Seattle, kinda cute (literally couldn’t tell from his photos. Why do guys post such shitty photos on that app?), and had an interesting bio–like living in Australia for a year. I thought ok, sounds great, right swipe it is! Three whole days go by, and he doesn’t even message me. I already had at least 20 conversations going on in that app and forgot about Brennan, until one random Tuesday night while I was still miserable, still detoxing, and getting tired of watching Cupcake Wars on Netflix, he finally sent me his pickup line.
I was totally NOT looking for a relationship. I REPEAT. I was NOT looking for a relationship. I wanted to explore what was out there, remember?!
Ten months later as I write this blog, I am happy and extremely thrilled that Brennan and I are still together, as happy as ever, and our relationship grows with every single day that passes. In fact, we both moved to Los Angeles around the same time to pursue both our individual dreams, as well as our dreams as a couple.
You’re probably thinking: Aw, how cute. Great story, but what does this have to do with manifestation, again?
Well… remember that “ideal mate” list that I created back before going to see Tony Robbins? The one where I listed what I imagined him to look like? Talk like? Act like? Think like?
Well, one random day about a few months after meeting Brennan for the first time and going on several dates, I was sitting in my bathtub reading a book. In this book (obviously a spiritual book about manifesting in true Kathrin fashion), the author mentioned how she one day got super clear on her ideal mate and manifested him just 3 days later. They got married and have been incredibly happy ever since. Reading that, I jolted right out of the bathtub, and ran. Yes, I ran. Still dripping wet and naked, straight to that worksheet, ripped it out of the workbook sitting on my bookshelf, and let my jaw just slowly drop.
Brennan fit every single quality that I wrote down. Like to a T. It was almost as if I wrote him down on paper and cosmically ordered him to appear into my life as if ordering from a catalog.
And THAT, babes, is how manifestation works.
You see, to answer your question, my belief is that it’s TOTALLY POSSIBLE to manifest a man. Manifestation works for relationships just as it does for money, objects, events, experiences, etc. You have to get absolute clear on what you want, and then let it go completely. You gotta trust that God, the Universe, whatever you believe in has heard you and will deliver to you. Only your higher power knows exactly what you need and the timing in which you need it. That higher power knows you so much better than you ever will. This is why letting it go is so important.
One huge mistake I see women making is forcing it. They force relationships. They force the timing (by moving too fast too soon). They force their man that they’re already with to morph into their ideal mate instead of being patient with him. They focus so hard on what’s not there, that they keep manifesting more of what is missing. Remember: what you focus on expands.
I believe that as women, when we fully love and accept ourselves, work hard on our personal development, and realize that we will be OK (way more than OK) to be single, the right man will appear. You always attract the kind of energy you put out there. If you are happy being by yourself, you will attract a relationship in which you are also happy in. If you are miserable being single, you’ll find yourself in a miserable relationship. What you put out there, comes back to you multiplied.
My advice to my babes? Get clear on your ideal mate just like you get clear on all your other life goals. Try the exercise for yourself. Write down exactly what you want your ideal mate to be like. Do it by HAND. When you write your intentions by hand, magical shit happens. More of my handwritten goals manifest than my typed goals ever have. It’s something that you just have to trust!
Think about some things like: What does he do for a living? How tall is he? What color are his eyes? Does he workout regularly? What is his build? Is he family oriented? What ethnicity is he? Does he smoke or drink? What are his eating habits like? What is his take on certain important matters? And so on.
Then hide that piece of paper from yourself and forget about it. Trust that the Universe knows what you need and when you need it. The man of your dreams will walk into your life so unexpectedly you will have absolutely zero idea of how it happened. It’ll be like walking right into a wall of bliss, and it’s going to be so freaking beautiful.
When you allow God, the Universe, your Higher Power, whatever you believe in, to decide when the man of your dreams walks into your life, it’s going to feel so good. Like it was meant to happen… because it was.
Whatever you desire in life, babe, you were MEANT to manifest. Love is something that you deserve without a doubt, and will receive an abundance of when you’re ready. In the meantime, it’s time to work on yourself. Love yourself so deeply, that the Universe could only bring you someone who matches that love you have for yourself.
I hope you enjoyed this blog! I have so so SO many more to come. Stay tuned, babes. Love you all.
To Your Massive Success,